Dignity

Much of this website will include and reference the word and concept of dignity.

Few people understand the true meaning of dignity, and even fewer realize the extraordinary impact it has on our lives and relationships.

When I ask people to define it, or tell me what it looks like to have their dignity honored, the conversation falters.

The most common response people offer is that dignity is about respect. To the contrary, dignity is not the same as respect. Dignity is our inherent value and worth as human beings; everyone is born with it. Respect, on the other hand, is earned through one’s actions.

Within Christianity and probably all religious teachings it is said that since God has honoured mankind by His great love, human beings should also reciprocate the same and show their love and respect for their fellow human beings. In other words, dignity is not earned by the meritorious conduct which is an expression of the favour and grace of God towards human beings.

After people learn about dignity, a remarkable thing happens. Everyone recognizes that we all have a deep, human desire to be treated as something of value. I believe that it is our highest common denominator.

We should have a mutual recognition of the desire to be seen, heard, listened to, and treated fairly; to be recognized, understood, and to feel safe in the world. When our identity is accepted and we feel included, we are granted a sense of freedom and independence and a life filled with hope and possibility.

If you have a religious basis for everything, then since we are made in the image of God, are we not dishonoring Him if we fail to acknowledge each individual’s identity?

Why Dignity Matters

We know how great it is to be seen, heard, and acknowledged for who we are and treated as if we mattered. Who doesn’t enjoy the praise of being recognized for doing a good job or being honored for going beyond the call of duty? We also know what it feels like to be treated as inferior, discriminated against, ignored, misunderstood, criticized and excluded. There is little worse than being in a situation where you are treated unfairly and can do nothing about it, or being excluded from something that means a lot to you. We are all too well aware of the feelings that accompany these violations of our dignity. What is not common is to bring them up for discussion. It is often too embarrassing to admit that we have been treated so badly. It is why I decided to focus my attention on matters of dignity and to give us a language to bring these issues to the surface so that we can legitimize the suffering that accompanies these painful human experiences and do something about them. We don’t have to just live with them. The dignity model has ways to address them.

The time has come to shed light on something that we may not have either the courage or language to discuss. The shame that accompanies being treated badly prevents us from doing the very thing we need to do to recover from violations of our dignity: bring them out into the open, validate them, and give them the attention they deserve. We wouldn’t think twice about getting help when we have a physical injury. When we have a wound to our dignity-there is nowhere to go; no 911 call, no emergency room. Bringing the issue to light can help us all heal from the many subtle and not-so-subtle ways that indignity has found its way into our lives. Every day I remind myself that “we can do better and we can do it with dignity.”

This website is dedicated to all the times and ways Becci has been treated so badly.

I am angry and will name and shame as best I can.

I have always argued the internet will do a better job of changing and influencing people’s actions than the pulpit ever has or can.

The action of shaming or praising will help to teach right from wrong.

In its simplest form it is a review.

If you do a bad job and are shamed, you can either learn from it and attempt to garner a positive response with further action, or carry on and run the risk of being shunned and driven out of business.

In the old days you could simply change your business name. It is not so easy these days. Your name and reputation will follow you wherever you go.

Nasty human beings will no longer be able to hide.